Thursday, May 31, 2007

Man Of The House

Picture it, 7:30am...
Jack: Where's dad?
Me: He already left for work.
Jack: When is he coming home?
Me: At dinnertime.
Jack: Well, I guess I am the man of the house since dad is gone!

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Whatever Toots Your Trigger!

I was giving Jack a bath this evening and he was attempting to make conversation by asking what each part of his Diego toy was.
Jack: (pointing at Diego's goggles) What's this mom?
Me: Goggles
Jack: (pointing at Diego's life vest) What's this mom?
Me: A life jacket
Jack: (pointing at Diego's fins) What’s this mom?
Me: Fins
Jack: Wrong! They are flippers.
Me: Flippers is just another way to say fins, most swimmers and scuba divers call them fins.
Jack: (pointing at Diego's watch) What’s this mom?
Me: His watch
Jack: What does he use it for?
Me: To tell time
Jack: Wrong! When people want to talk to Diego they appear on a flip up screen like a computer. Do you still think it is a watch?
Me: Yes
Jack: whatever toots your trigger, mom...but you are wrong!
Me: Do you mean whatever toots your horn?
Jack: No, I mean trigger, like a gun
Me: Do you mean whatever trips your trigger?
Jack: No, I mean toot like a stinky

If Your Day Is Dull, Go To Wal-Mart

Just when I was beginning to think I didn't have any interesting or funny blog stories for today, I had to run to Wal-Mart to buy a couple of odds and ends. We parked right next to an ambulance and happened upon the EMS guys. Jack was standing there staring at him while I was loading the babies into the cart. Just as I got everyone out the driver asked if he could give the kids stickers and let Jack look in the truck. It was so nice of him! Jack was on cloud nine as we walked in. He and Lauren were wearing their stickers with pride as Ben chewed on his. As we strolled up and down the aisles Jack chattered about our good luck parking next to the ambulance. Then he saw a man in fatigues. "Look mom, a solider! Can I say hi to him?" As I was telling him yes the man turned and they shared a high five. I was so proud of Jack when he thanked the man for keeping us safe. I didn't really know that he had made that connection.

As we walked away Jack and I talked about how lucky we were to have gotten to talk to an "amb-lee-ance" driver and a solider in one day. I couldn't help but think that no trip to Wal-Mart is good so I was due for at least two bad incidents. Then, it happened. We passed a very hairy young Hispanic girl and Jack yells, "that's no fair, that little boy has a mustache and I don't!” Ouch! My only hope was that the little girl didn't speak English, because I know she heard him! This was particularly embarrassing to me because I was once that hairy little girl. Luckily, I discovered the joy of waxing and most recently laser hair removal! At this point, I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, knowing I was in for one more "incident". As we continued on our shopping adventure I started smelling something foul coming from Ben's diaper. It seemed unfortunate, but I knew this wasn't the incident I was waiting for. Then, as I stood searching for Father's Day cards it happened. Jack spilled nearly the entire bag of marshmallows I had allowed him to snack on as we went through the store. I breathed a sigh of relief as I thought the two bad incidents weren't all bad and the good had certainly out weighed the bad. As I stood in the check out line behind the woman who was price matching every item she was buying to save two cents I started to get a little annoyed, but I was still feeling as though I was coming out even.

Then I got to the car...and all shit broke loose...literally! I picked up Ben and realized that the foul smell wasn't just coming from Ben's diaper, but from his shorts and running down his legs as well. I quickly unloaded one of the plastic grocery sacks and lined Ben's car seat with it, and then dug out my wipes stash and cleaned up the cart as best I could. I felt like I should have left a note on that cart so the next unsuspecting mother didn't put her baby in that soiled seat! But I couldn't find any paper and figured the Wal-Mart employees wouldn't care anyway. I only hope I am not struck down by bad cart karma next time I am shopping.

Southern Boy

I love this age! Ben and Lauren are so much fun right now. It makes me sad that I missed it with Jack. When Jack was 22 months I was only focused on the things he was doing that were annoying me because I had such bad morning sickness. My strongest memory of Jack is when he would get scared and cry when I was throwing up. When I knew I was about to get sick I would dial my parents on the phone and have them talk to him so I could blow chow.

This morning I went into the Ben and Lauren's room and said, "good morning guys!” Lauren said "morning mommy", then looked at Ben and said "morning Ben Jim". I know Ben and Lauren were born in the south, but I don't remember giving him a double name like Jim Bob, Billy Joe or Bobby Ray!

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

She's A Super Freak...

Super freak, she's super freaky! Lauren loves green beans. I have never met a child who loves green beans. She pries the bean open, slurps out the little "bean seeds" then eats the outside with as much enthusiasm as she does ice cream.

Lauren is talking more and more every day. Today she walked around the house like a magpie saying "I'm Yo-wen!” translation "I'm Lauren!"

It's A Great Day For A Race!

Actually, it wasn't a very good day for the Indy 500 last weekend, it rained again! Why do they have this huge race over Memorial Day? It seems like it rains every year. But, I digress...

My grandpa used to always say "It's a great day for a race...the human race!” I think about my family a lot this time of year, especially my grandpa and my dad. Memorial Day is one of their favorite holidays. Yes, my grandpa was a WWII veteran, but most importantly Memorial Day marks the beginning of summer and "The Lake" season. When I was growing up every weekend in the summer was spent at the lake, rain or shine. My sister and I made birdhouses, played games and colored when it rained. When it was sunny we caught toads, swam, played in the sand, played on the rope swing and fished. My best childhood memories revolve around the little yellow cabin in Cedar Creek. It is no longer a little yellow cabin and my grandpa is no longer around. My grandpa died the summer after my freshman year in college in August of 1994. The little yellow cabin was torn down and replaced with a larger trailer type home sometime around 2000. One thing hasn't changed, the memories and the closeness I feel toward my family when I am there. I miss my grandpa dearly, but I feel closer to him at the lake than anywhere else. We are heading to Nebraska next month and I can't wait to reconnect. My grandma, mom, dad and I will eat nachos and drink wine for lunch, a tradition that goes back at least 10 years! I will sit back and watch my kids enjoy all of the things that I did as a child I can't wait!

Saturday, May 26, 2007

For The Record...

The cake was a success. Everyone seemed to like it. The kids even wanted to eat their steak when they saw what they were missing. I am going to have to put a note in my cookbook, 40 minutes in the oven is the key!

Barbara Shop

I used to cut Jack's hair in the backyard all the time, but lately he has been going to the barber with Travis. The last time he came home with the absolute worst haircut. It was buzzed at about a #3 all over his head with a long tuft slightly off center in the front. It was bad. So bad that I actually had to do a little correction work. But, I didn't tell Jack because I didn't want him to feel self-conscious. His hair has finally grown out, so I took him outside in between raindrops today for a good free haircut!
Jack: Are you cutting my hair because the barbara gave me a bad haircut?
Me: You mean barber?
Jack: Yes, are you cutting my hair because I got a bad haircut at the barbara shop?
Me: Who told you that you got a bad haircut?
Jack: Nobody
Me: It wasn't bad
Jack: Then why did you cut it after I got home?
Me: Well, it wasn't good either
Jack: So, is that why I am not getting my hair cut at the barbara shop today?
Me: In a word, yes.
Jack: What word?
Me: Never mind

Rain, Rain Go Away...

It seems like it has been raining for 40 days and 40 nights in North Texas. Running errands have been hellacious. There is absolutely no hurrying in with three little kids. Worse yet, the kids haven't been able to play outside. Playing outside is the best way for the kids to burn off energy. Jack loves to pedal his tractor pulling Ben and Lauren behind in the wagon. We have been stuck inside and last night Jack was stir crazy. He asked for some grapes for a snack while we were waiting for our friends to arrive for dinner. I was so proud of Jack's choice of snacks. I put the grapes in a bowl and set him up at the table. I turned my head for just a second and there were grapes rolling all over the kitchen floor. I calmly asked Jack to pick them up and sit back down. He got off his chair, bent down and started smashing the grapes with his thumbs. I came unhinged! When Jack made the decision to make wine on my kitchen floor he wasn't taking into account that I am a little stir crazy too. After he got finished serving his time on the steps (my friend says my kids aren't going to want to live in two story houses when they grow up!) I heard Lauren crying. When I went to pick her up her face was all wet. I called Jack over to ask him why she was wet.
Me: Why is Lauren's face all wet?
Jack: If I tell you, I won't be in trouble?
Me: You will tell me and I will let you know if you are in trouble or not.
Jack: (lip quivering) I spit on her
Me: Are you kidding me? go sit on the steps!!
Jack got a sad potty over that one! He has a chart on the fridge with happy little animals for each day of the week. If he is naughty we put the picture of a potty with a tear. Jack didn't notice the sad potty until he was sitting at the breakfast table this morning.
Jack: Mom, could you come over here please?
Me: Sure, what do you need?
Jack: Can you please tell me what that sad potty is doing up there?
Me: Do you remember spitting on your sister yesterday?
Jack: Yes
Me: Do you remember smashing the grapes on the floor?
Jack: Yes
Me: Why did you act that way?
Jack: I was just tired, mom
Me: I guess we need to make sure you take a nap everyday!

Friday, May 25, 2007

By Golly, I Think I've Done It!

I have been trying to make a chocolate angel food cake from scratch for months. I typically try twice before I cave and get a store bought cake. I made one that worked before I had kids and it has been down hill ever since. Only two things have changed 1) I got a better mixer (I went from a Sunbeam to a Kitchenaid) and 2) we moved to a new house with a different oven and I haven't been able to make it work since. I even enlisted Travis' help last night and we still failed. I decided to give it one more try this morning because my friend Anne and her family are coming over for dinner. Anne is one of those people that prove her love by making extravagant meals from scratch. I always feel inadequate having them over for dinner, but the great company makes it all worthwhile! I made a pork loin for them once that Travis referred to as 'creepy' right at the table. Anne and her husband didn't say anything...but they didn't dispute Travis' analysis.

Anyway, I loaded the kids in the car this morning to go get more eggs. While I was at the store I got a store bought cake just incase! Travis thought the cake was undercooked last night, so today I increased the cook time from 30 to 40 minutes (the recipe calls for 25-30 minutes). The cake isn't pretty, but at least it is better than the ones that have come out to only be a couple of inches. I will reserve final judgment until we try the cake tonight. Worst-case scenario, Anne will know how much I love her by looking at my ugly cake!

Big Girls Don't Cry

Lauren had her first haircut today. I was so proud of her, she didn't cry at all. Well, actually she whimpered a little when the hairdresser was wetting her hair. You know how she doesn't like to get wet! After that she stayed really still because she was promised sparkles in her hair if she didn't move. She looks so pretty and grown up! I had to bring Ben and Jack with us too, I only had to talk to them a couple of times about behaving, but they were really great too. I was just counting my blessings that there wasn't a melt down at the salon and wanted to leave as soon as possible without incident. After I got the kids all loaded into the car I realized that I had forgotten to pay. I was so embarrassed, I had to run back in and admit that I was a little overwhelmed!
I have been spending the last couple of days throwing myself a pity party over my MS trouble. Travis has been so supportive; he has really reminded me why I married him. He knows just what to say when I am feeling down. He has encouraged me to fight. It has taken me awhile to let it soak in, but I am not going to take this lying down! Yesterday I called my neurologist and got the next available appointment...October 25th! Can you believe that! I did some research online and found that other people have had success with physical therapy, so I got my neurologist to give me a referral to a physical therapist and as soon as we are insured again I will start going!

Trisha's dad sold office space in Santa Fe to Life Vessel, which is an enclosed, patented unit in which light, sound, frequency, and vibration are imparted to the patient. It is non-invasive. The Life Vessel does not cure, heal, or mitigate disease. It just supports the body's own natural healing ability to do so. The Life Vessel detoxifies and removes stress from the body. It also helps balance the Autonomic Nervous System (ANS). The ANS regulates every conscious and unconscious function and organ within the body. A balanced ANS is critical to a balanced and effective immune system. If the ANS is out of balance, health will deteriorate and may not improve no matter what else is done. I know it sounds a little over the top, but I am willing to try anything! It won't hurt me, but it might help!! Plus, it will give me an excuse to go back to Santa Fe!!

It is my responsibility to be positive. I need to make myself better and I will! My kids deserve nothing but the best. I am constantly looking at my life and thinking about how lucky I am. I have three beautiful, healthy, happy kids and a wonderful, hard working, supportive husband, they deserve more than the depressed lump I have been lately. So, those of you who are hanging out at my pity party...you don't have to go home, but you can't stay here! The party is over!!

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Double Trouble

What is that woman thinking? This morning I had to silence all of the kids (I had Trisha's kids too, so I had a 5 year old, 4 year old, nearly 3 year old and 22 month old twins) in order to hear a story about the oldest American woman to give birth to twins. This crazy lady is 60 years old and her husband is 63. This couple has a 33-year-old son, 29-year-old daughter and a 6-year-old son. The twins that were just born are boys. I think that this couple has no idea what they are getting into. Nobody who has twins has any idea what they are getting into until they get home with their babies. I know how tired Travis and I were those first couple weeks and we had my parents here to help. If this couples parents are still alive, I can't imagine that they are a lot of help. I consider my mom to be is great shape at 56 years old and I don't think that she could be a full time mother of twins. My mom and my aunt watched the kids for us when we went to Puerto Rico last summer and they admitted to being very tired when they got home. They are not the kind of people who admit that kind of thing, so they had to have been really spent! Every night when I get the kids to bed I feel like plopping down on the couch and falling asleep. What is going to happen when this couple has 2 two-year-old boys and an 8 year old? When they finally get the toddlers to bed will they have the energy to help the 8 year old with his homework? When they are 76 and 79 will they have the nerve to teach two boys to drive? When they are 78 and 81 will they be willing to take money from their retirement to pay for three kids in college at once? They may answer yes to these questions now, but we will only know when the time comes. If they end up being everything their children deserve, more power to them. If not, they should be ashamed of themselves for being so selfish. I feel sorry for their grandchildren-to-be. Their adult children don't have kids yet, but when they do, they will miss out on having doting grandparents. They certainly won't spoil them the way my kids grandparents do if they have their own kids. People who are in their 60s should be looking forward to grandparenthood, not parenthood.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Me

Okay, so this is a new one for me since I am a relatively new blogger. My buddy Anne roped me into this, so here we go...
INSTRUCTIONS: Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot, like so.
1) The Life & Times of a First Time Stay at Home Mom
2) Mom of 2 and Wife of 1
3) BlondeMomBlog
4) Bun in the Oven
5) Happily Shoveling Water with a Pitchfork

Next select five people to tag:
Over My Head, Rainy Day in May
Okay, I can't tag five people because I don't know many bloggers.

What were you doing 10 years ago?
Ten years ago I was graduating from college, working full time and planning a wedding. Most importantly, ten years ago on June 14th Travis and I were married and the rest is history!

What were you doing 1 year ago?
One year ago I was finally coming out of the fog of having infant twins.

Five snacks you enjoy:
1). Pretzels
2). Rice cakes
3). Shrimp with cocktail sauce
4). Strawberries
5). Jack's candy, preferably chocolate (if I am premenstrual)

Five songs that you know all the lyrics to:
1). It’s A Great Day To Be Alive - Travis Tritt
2). Batter Up - Nelly
3). We Shall Be Free - Garth Brooks
4). Wonderland - John Mayer
5). Every Beatles song

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:
1). Give a bundle to the National MS society
2). Fund the 529 plans
3). Build a new house with a pool
4). Travel more
5). Stop worrying about money

Five bad habits:
1). Eating
2). Skipping exercise
3). Speeding
4). Laying in the sun
5). I never apologize

Five things you like doing:
1). Traveling
2). Crafts
3). Hanging with friends and family
4). Reading (not that I have read a book in a long time!)
5). Photography

Five things you would never wear again:
1). Glasses (sunglasses okay, glasses for seeing not okay)
2). Tie (remember when that was popular in the 80's)
3). Suspenders (the 80's weren't good to me)
4). More than one pair of earrings at a time
5). Oversized Flannel Shirts (see comments from #2 and #3)

Five favorite toys:
1). Thomas Wooden Railway
2). Arts & Crafts
3). Fisher Price Digital Camera
4). Games
5). Books

Clean It Up Grandpa

In the car on the way home from playgroup:
Jack: That man on the radio said "hell" in the song
Me: Just don't listen to it
Jack: Okay, I will cover my ears. Mom, why can you listen to it and I can't?
Me: Because I know that I shouldn't say those words.
Jack: Grandpa says those words
Me: Yes, but you shouldn't
Jack: I am not going to say those words because I don't want to be old like Grandpa
Me: Grandpa isn't old because he uses those words
Jack: Then why is he old?
Me: Because he has lived a long time.
Jack: Why has he lived a long time?
Me: I don't know
Jack: I thought you knew everything?
Me: I do.
Jack: Were you lying to me?
Me: No
Jack: Then why has Grandpa lived so long?
Me: Because he is a good person.
Jack: Then why does he say naughty words?
Me: I don't know
Jack: Remember when you told me that you know everything? You lied to me!
Me: Look! There's a squirrel...
Jack: Don't change the subject!

"Bring Out The Gimp"

"But the Gimp's sleeping."
"Well, I guess you're gonna have to go wake him up now, won't you?"
I really didn't care for Pulp Fiction; actually I disliked it so much the first time that Travis and I walked out of the theater. But, that isn't the point I am trying to make.

Trisha and I took the kids for a walk this morning and I was so gimpy it was embarrassing. My leg started tripping less than half way through and got so bad by the end that I was just glad that I could use the stroller like a walker. I just hate this MS; it is really pissing me off!!! A special thank you to Trisha for putting up with me.

Ben is in a mood today. He really hasn't stopped fussing at me since he woke up this morning. The poor little dude is trying to tell me something and I am just not getting it! I can't wait until he is old enough to feel guilty for treating me crappy on days that I am gimpy!

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Just When Everything Is Going Well...

I woke up singing 'It's A Great Day To Be Alive' by Travis Tritt. I am not a real country fan, but I used to be and this song has always stuck with me.

I got rice cooking in the microwave
Got a three day beard I don't plan to shave
And it's a goofy thing but I just gotta say
Hey I'm doing alright

Yeah I think I'll make me some homemade soup
Feelin pretty good and that's the truth
It's neither drink nor drug induced
No I'm just doin alright

And it's a great day to be alive
I know the sun's still shinin when I close my eyes
There's some hard times in the neigborhood
But why can't every day be just this good?

It's been fifteen years since I left home
Said good luck to every seed I'd sown
Give it my best and then I left it alone
Oh...I hope their doin alright

Now I look in the mirror and what do I see?
A lone wolf there starin back at me
Long in the tooth but harmless as can be
Lord I guess he's doin alright

And it's a great day to be alive
I know the sun's still shinin when I close my eyes
There's some hard times in the neigborhood
But why can't every day be just this good?

Sometimes it's lonely
Sometimes it's only me
And the shadows that fill this room
Sometimes I'm fallin
Desperately callin
Howlin at the moon...
Ahwoo!
Ahwoo!

Well I might go get me a new tattoo
Or take my old Harley for a three day cruise
Might even grow me a Fu Man Chu...
Oh Aww!

And it's a great day to be alive
I know the sun's still shinin when I close my eyes
There's some hard times in the neigborhood
But why can't every day be just this good?

And it's a great day to be alive
I know the sun's still shinin when I close my eyes
There's some hard times in the neigborhood
But why can't every day be just this good?

I was sitting on the floor stretching my back out this morning when Jack woke up. He was so sweet and without any words came up and started rubbing my back. What a good boy!

Just when I thought it couldn't get any better I heard Jack and Lauren talking from the laundry room.
Jack: I will put your shoes on for you, but I don't want you to take them off as soon as I put them on, okay?
Lauren: K
Jack: You mean, yes sir!
Lauren: yeser
Jack: Good girl!
The next thing I knew Lauren came toddling out of the laundry room with her shoes on. Wow! Jack actually put her shoes on; I thought they were just talking. This will really be great if I can get him to put her shoes on while I put on Ben's!

Just when I thought the day couldn't get any better, I was right. I was fixing my breakfast thinking I would actually have time to run to the dry cleaners before Trisha's son came over for the morning. Just then Lauren fell off bottom rung of the kitchen chair. She was lying under the table crying hysterically. I assumed she was being a drama queen again so I picked her up and put her in the family room. I figured if she were going to lie on the floor and throw a fit that it would be more comfortable on the carpet than the kitchen tile. I continued to make my breakfast and ate, all the while Lauren was crying. When she cried for 5-10 minutes straight I thought it was time to pick her up and check her out. She didn't have any visible bumps or bruises, then she hurled all over herself, the carpet and me. I should have left her on the kitchen floor! Now what? We just discovered last night that we don't have any health insurance. Travis' insurance from his old job ceased on his last day and come to find out it doesn't kick in at the new place until June 1st. I called the nurse at the pediatrician's office and got her voicemail then I called Travis who didn't answer either. So I called Trisha, between Trisha, her husband and I we decided that since her eyes weren't dilated, they were changing when I put the flashlight in her face and she wasn't acting dizzy she would be fine. The nurse finally called and she gave me some other things to watch out for, but she didn't think it was necessary to bring her in. The great thing is that I didn't even have to tell her that we don't have any insurance. I feel like white trash! Not to mention that I didn't get to the dry cleaners!

Monday, May 21, 2007

Good Lord That's A Lot Of Money!

When I was 16 I could cough up a five spot and have enough gas to drive around town in my oxidized red 1980 (For those of you who are math challenged, I was 16 in 1991!) Dodge Omni for a couple more days. And if all else failed I could attempt to use the hole rusted in the floor to stick my feet out like Fred Flintstone. I have to feel sorry for the teenagers of today who can only drive a couple more miles after putting in 5 bucks! Not to mention that all of the spoiled brats down here drive new SUVs. Of course, I used to make $2 an hour when I would baby-sit; only 15 years later we are paying $10 per hour. Boy I feel old. I am feeling like I need to tell a story about walking to school up hill both ways through snow without any shoes!

Sunday, May 20, 2007

Good Friends + Good Wine = Bad Sunday

Last night we had dinner at friends. It was a threesome of sorts. Anne and her husband invited our family and Trisha's family over. The girls polished off a couple bottles of wine and a delicious vodka concoction Anne made. Needless to say, Travis and I were pretty tired today and didn't do much beyond eating and napping. It was worth the wasted day because last night was really fun, I am so glad that Trisha and Anne enjoy each other’s company. The only problem is that they are our only two couple friends. If we all start getting together that has cut our once full weekends down to just one night. I guess we are going to have to start accepting applications for at least one more couple! I have met lots of girl friends since we have moved, but Travis has rejected most of their husbands. The search continues!

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Mommy Wins 'Most Popular'...Today

This morning I had to go to the grocery store to buy things for the appetizer I am taking to dinner. Unfortunately, the mower crapped out yesterday so Travis had to go to the auto parts store so he could try to fix it. We agreed that he would take Jack and I would take Ben and Lauren. When Travis told Jack about the adventure they were about to embark on Jack politely declined. I figured I would solve the problem by letting him "choose".
Me: Jack, would you rather go to the cool auto parts store with daddy in the Porsche or would you rather come with me in the station wagon to the grocery store.
Jack: I want to go with you!
Me: What? You don't want to go on a convertible ride?
Jack: No, I want to go with you
Me: It is going to take mommy a long time at the grocery store, are you sure you want to go with me?
Jack: Yep, I want to go with you
How did this happen? I didn't even tell Jack that we were going to the fancy high-end grocery store where he can push his own mini cart. Since when am I the most popular? Just when you think you know your kids they go and pull a fast one! My plan backfired and I ended up with all three kids at the grocery store.

When we got to the store I loaded Ben and Lauren into the giant cart with the steering wheels and Jack secured his own mini cart. We started on our way getting happy glances from all of the old people who were shopping early on Saturday morning. Things were going great, Jack was filling his cart with all of my selections, until I had to spend some time looking at the sun dried tomatoes. I wasn't exactly sure what I needed so I had to spend a lot of time looking at the labels. When I turned around Ben was climbing out of his little car. I explained in the nicest good mom tone that we would have to strap him into the baby seat if he didn't sit down like a big boy. Not only did he not sit down, he started pushing the cart into my ankles. I could feel the nasty looks from the woman in volleyball shorts and a cast on her ankle. I picked Ben up and strapped him in. He screamed like a banshee as snot ran down his face.
Jack: Can I drive the car now?
Me: What are we going to do with your cart?
Jack: I don't want to push the cart anymore.
Me: If you decide to drive the car you can't change your mind and push the cart again
Jack: What are we going to do with the cart?
Me: We are going to get rid of it
Jack: What are we going to do with the groceries that are in there?
Me: I am going to put them into my cart
Jack: I want to drive
Me: Okay, get in.
I pulled all of the groceries out of the mini cart as the woman in the hot pants looked on in disgust. I then turned around to help Jack into the car. When I turned back around to take care of the mini cart I saw the skinny wench in the hot pants stomping off with the cart as if I was going to abandon it right there. I couldn't believe it. I stood there and just watched her, until I couldn't take it anymore and said, "You have got to be kidding me!" I am not sure if she heard me or not. I don't know what crawled up this woman's ass, but she has obviously never been to the grocery store with a kid before, let alone three. And, I have news for her, she isn't fooling anyone, everyone knows she wasn't playing volleyball with a broken ankle. So, why was she wearing those shorts to the grocery store? What a skank!

Friday, May 18, 2007

Book 'Em

I went to a seminar last night entitled "What Your Child Needs To Know Before Kindergarten". The speaker didn't give a list of the things my child needs to know before kindergarten, it was a bait and switch! However, she did give us some good information on reading to our kids. The take away information is that we should be reading 3 books and 2 nursery rhymes to our children (individually) every night before bed. Do the math that is 9 books and 6 rhymes per night. We are going to have to start the bedtime routine right after dinner! We started last night and they all loved their book time. I think having a little wind down routine helped the babies fall asleep. I didn't even hear them get out of bed last night. I am not going to call it success until I can replicate the results tonight!

Thursday, May 17, 2007

School's Out For Summer

Today was Jack's last day of school. Apparently they talked about their summer plans at school today.
Jack: Where are we going for our summer vacation?
Me: We will have to talk to daddy about taking some time off work.
Jack: Where should we go?
Me: Maybe we could go to San Antonio
Jack: What do you do in San Antonio?
Me: Sea World, Six Flags, the river walk, there are a lot of things to do
Jack: Do they have zip lines?
Me: I don't think so
Jack: I want to go to the place in my magazine that has zip lines
Me: Costa Rica?
Jack: Yeah, that's it!
Me: If daddy and I get to go to Costa Rica, you aren't coming
Jack: Why not?
Me: You are too little to do zip lines
Jack: Says who?
Me: Says me
Jack: Well that isn't fun or fair!
Me: Sorry buddy
Jack: I guess we can go to Santonio then

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Kick Me While I Am Down

Travis took my car in for service today, so I was basically stuck at home with three kids under 4 and a Porsche Boxster. Travis had dinner with some friends from his old job so I put the kids in the stroller and headed over to Trisha's for dinner. On our way over Jack was talking a mile a minute:
Jack: Look at the doggies, mom
Me: I see them
Jack: I think that man is angry with them
The man was walking a Bassett Hound and a Black Lab; the Bassett Hound kept running into the bushes and twisting the leash around them. When we were walking past the man I said, "Those dogs look like they are more trouble than kids". The man took one look at me and the three kids in the triple stroller with the open bottle of wine in the pocket and said "I bet it would go better if I carried a bottle of wine!" For the record, I hadn't even had a sip of wine, it was to have at Trisha's.
Jack: What are those black lines?
Me: Tar
Jack: What is that for?
Me: They are expansion joints for the woad
Jack: Mom, the word is Road, can you say rrrroad?
Lauren: Road!
Jack: See mom, even Lauren can say Road, can you say rrrroad?
Me: Yes, Jack I can say road.
Jack: Then why didn't you say it the first time?
Kick me while I am down Jack! Lately, when I am exercising I end up slurring my words when I get a little fatigued. I don't really know how to explain MS to Jack. I have told him that I have MS and he knows that I have to have a shot everyday, but he doesn't know anything about the symptoms. I don't want him to be scared, but I do want to teach him to be understanding of people who are different than him.

Liar, Liar

Did you ever see that movie with Jim Carey, 'Liar, Liar'? I am suddenly feeling like the main character that can't lie and ends up saying offensive things. At Jack's award ceremony yesterday the teachers gave us sample of the kids writing. Let's just say Jack isn't the best writer in the class. Actually, since we are telling the truth, he is giving the worst a run for his money. Anyway, Jack showed me his writing with pride and I sarcastically said, "Where is it?” one of his teachers heard me and pointed to his scribbles and said, "Right here, see the J?”

After school I was collecting money from the other parents for pizza. One mother hadn't paid and I saw her in the parking lot waving her two bucks at me. I yelled, "I want my two dollars!” which is a quote from 'Better Off Dead'. The other mother didn't get my joke and looked at me like I was being really rude. So, rather than let it go I explained it is a line from 'Better Off Dead'. She continued to look blankly at me so I further explained by saying it was a movie from the 80s. She is an older mom, so it ended up looking like I was saying she was old.

Then as if it couldn't get any worse I took the kids to Wal-Mart to pick up a few things. There was a woman there who was having a really hard time with her little boy. He was probably two and a half and running away from her at every opportunity. She was at her breaking point and yelling at him as though she had lost it. I ended up in line behind her. My three kids were being angels believe it or not. Her little boy was hanging out by my cart. I told her it was fine and looked after him while she paid for her groceries. The guy behind me in line asked me if I had four kids and I said "NO! that one isn't mine" pointing at the naughty little boy. The woman turned around to see if she needed to save her child from something. I gave her a sheepish little wave and she turned back around. I was feeling a little guilty about how my statement sounded so I chased her down with my car in the parking lot, rolled down my window and explained that I didn't mean that her kid was naughty, just that I didn't have four kids. This ended up making me look like more of an ass, but whatever!

Last night I went to a friend's to watch 'An Inconvenient Truth' with several others. The movie was informative, but Al Gore is such a dope. That's right, I said it out loud. But I didn't stop there, I then asked if he did this research before or after he invented the internet. It was as though I had diarrhea of the mouth. The others looked at me like I had floated a turd in the party punch bowl. Besides that little event, the evening was fun. I miss getting together and speaking intelligently with others rather than talking about the size of my son's poop or what my daughter stuck up her nose.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Most Enthusiastic

Jack was named the most enthusiastic monkey at awards day. His teacher said that she loved his jokes. I am not sure if he tells them different jokes than I hear or if the teachers just have a lame sense of humor. Jack keeps showing me his award and telling me that it says, "Jack tells the funniest jokes".

The bluebonnets are gone and Jack is convinced that they have been replace with purple bonnets. It took me a while to understand what he was talking about until we passed a giant field of them.
Jack: Look mom, there they are
Me: What
Jack: The purple bonnets
Me: Where
Jack: Right there, the things with the pokey things on their leaves, daddy says they are weeds
Me: You mean the thistles?
Jack: No, they are purple bonnets, just like the bluebonnets that Elsie and I ran through
Me: Okay, you're the boss; we'll call them purple bonnets

Monday, May 14, 2007

Bestest Monkey

Tomorrow is "Monkey Class Award Day" for preschool. I am under the impression that every kid will get an award. We are supposed to "dress up and make it special". Before Jack went to bed I asked him a few questions about the awards ceremony.
Me: Are you excited about Monkey Class Award Day?
Jack: What?
Me: Do you think you will get an award tomorrow?
Jack: No
Me: You don't think that you do anything the best in your class?
Jack: No
Me: There isn't anything that makes you different? Are you the funniest? The smartest?
Jack: Well, I am the bestest singer
The best singer? Are you kidding me? Travis and I don't sing, how could you possibly be the bestest singer? I just started singing in church in the last couple years. I even mouthed the words when I sung in the church youth choir!

Sunday, May 13, 2007

"Welcome To Hell, May I Take Your Order?"

In the car on the way to dinner,
Jack: Where are we going mom?
Me: Diner
Jack: Why haven't you asked me where I want to go?
Me: Because I don't care where you want to go
Jack: Why not?
Me: Because it is Mother's Day, Mommy gets to pick
Jack: When is it going to be Kid's Day?
I was tempted to respond as my mother had to me many times before and say "Everyday is Kid's Day". But, back then when my mom said that to me I vowed to never say it to my own child.

All I wanted for my Mother's Day dinner was a good margarita and cheesecake for dessert. I decided on The Cheesecake Factory. We went at 5 o'clock assuming that the babies would behave better if we went early. I didn't account for the 55 - 70 minute wait. We didn't sit down until after 6:30. By this point, Ben and Lauren were already annoyed. We ended up with the waitress that was trying to track down a table full of people that ordered drinks then walked out. Great start! I was trying to enjoy myself so I didn't let it bug me. Ben and Lauren on the other hand weren't as forgiving. They refused to sit in their highchairs so I held Lauren and Travis held Ben. It is hard to decide what was the high point. When Lauren was climbing all over me exposing my bra to anyone who was interested. Or, when Ben spit bread on Travis and he actually uttered, "Fuck you Ben", I think it was meant to be under his breath, but I heard it across the table. Travis finally got Ben to sit between him and Jack in the booth. Poor Jack was a great sport; he ate his dinner without complaining as Ben smashed his face against the wall. Ben and Lauren took turns spilling milk, crying, throwing food, you name it. Needless to say I got my cheesecake to go.

In the car on the way home with crying in the background:
Me: Jack, thanks for being such a good boy at the restaurant
Jack: Your welcome
Me: You really made me proud
Jack: I think Lauren is freaking out
Me: News flash
Jack: What?
Me: Nevermind, why do you think she is so upset?
Jack: I think she is pooping or she is just freaking out for no good reason
Me: I fear it is the later
Jack: What?
Me: Nevermind...thanks for being a good boy

When we got home Jack told me that he would share HIS cheesecake with me. Excuse me, who told you that it was your cheesecake? The little hog ate all of the whipped cream and at least half of my Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake. Next year I think I will just make my own margaritas and cheesecake!

Happy Mother's Day

We are having a great relaxing day. We went to church then had a picnic at the park. We will go out to dinner tonight at a kid friendly restaurant. I don't know who wrote this poem, but I like it on a day like today!

Dear Lord, it's such a hectic day,
With little time to stop and pray,
For life's been anything but calm,
Since you called on me to be a Mom.

Running errands, matching socks,
Building dreams with building blocks,
Cooking, cleaning, and finding shoes,
And other stuff that children lose.

Fitting lids on bottled bugs,
Wiping tears and giving hugs.
A stack of last week's mail to read,
So where's the quiet time I need?

Yet when I steal a minute Lord,
Just at the sink or ironing board,
To ask the blessing of your grace,
I see them in my small one's face,

That you have blessed me all the while,
As I stop to kiss that precious smile.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

The Destruction Duo Strikes Again

Ben and Lauren came out of the gate strong on sleeping in their new beds, but things have changed. The biggest change is that Lauren can now open doors. From what I can piece together; after I put the babies to bed they get up and work together to spread toys over every square inch of their floor. Then they move to the door. Lauren makes several attempts at the door while Ben waits patiently for it to open, when it does he runs for the hills with a wild look in his eyes and a huge grin on his face. The problem is that they are exhausted. They didn't take a morning nap; I assumed that they must not be tired if they were able to muster enough energy to escape. I was wrong, poor Ben was falling asleep in his lunch. I assumed that the afternoon nap would be easy since they were so tired. I was wrong, they laid down nice, but as soon as they finished their milk they got their second wind and trashed their room again, then escaped. Desperate times call for desperate measures. We turned the doorknob around so the lock was on the outside, just like we did when Jack went to a big boy bed. Go ahead, call CPS, if you have a better idea I am open to suggestions! When I checked on them after they had quieted down, I found them both asleep on the floor in front of the door. Jack was always smart enough to go back to bed after his nighttime escapades.

Ben and Lauren have been perfecting the cutest trick. They stand with their feet and head and hands on the floor prepared to do a somersault. They can't perform the somersault themselves, they wait for someone to take their ankles and flip them over. As soon as you flip them they are rolling over and preparing to do it again. They will do it over and over as long as there is someone to flip them.

Friday, May 11, 2007

I Am Getting Soft

I used to make fun of my mom when some day-to-day event would move her to tears. Today 3 local people died in auto accidents during their morning commute. I can't help but think that was someone's parent on their way to work, just trying to make the best life possible for their kids. It was someone's child, someone's sibling and someone's spouse. What if it was Travis? How would our lives change? What would we do? How would we go on? Today many lives changed because these people were in the wrong place at the wrong time. Meanwhile, there are people sitting in traffic fretting because they are going to be late. Thinking they will have to stay late because they arrived late. Concerned that their weekend will be delayed. Thank God it wasn't our lives that were changed today!

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Lucky Me!

How did I get so lucky? Today was muffins with mom at Jack's preschool. The kids sang a special surprise song; I can honestly say that Jack was the best one. Jack had all of the hand motions down and was so cute! I will say it wasn't a big surprise to me because Jack told me yesterday that they were going to sing a special surprise song and it goes like this and then proceeded to sing me the song. The kids made trivets with their handprints and vases out of paper cups with flowers made from sponges and drinking straws. The kids also wrote 'My Mommy's Biography", this is what Jack wrote about me:
"My Mommy's name is Kelli. She is 6 feet tall and weighs 64 pounds. Her hair color is black and her eyes are blue. The prettiest thing about my mother is that I like to hug her. Even though she is 4 years old, she still looks good. I love my mommy because I like to hug her. But she really gets mad when I get cheese without asking. When I am really good she gives me stickers. When I am at school she goes to the post office. I am glad she is my mother because I love her."
For the record, I am only 5'10" and I actually weigh about 66 pounds. My hair is brown as are my eyes. I asked Jack what color my eyes were and he said, "I was just kidding, I know your eyes are black".

Our neighbors opened up their pool today. Jack was very excited to break it back in. I took all three kids over. Jack got right in while the babies took their time getting adjusted. Ben finally stood in the water on the stairs and played catch with the neighbor girl, while Lauren wore goggles on her head like a headband and strutted around the deck like a model. She got annoyed every time a splash of water would touch her skin. Ben was getting less and less cautious as he played. He fell off the step, but don't worry, I've still got it; I swooped him up without even getting my shorts wet. I shocked all of my neighbors when I pulled Ben out of the water and cheered him on for getting his hair wet. Lauren was highly traumatized, but it wasn't long before Ben was ready to try it again. That's my boy! As we were leaving, the neighbor said "bye-bye" to the kids in his Donald Duck voice, it was so cute when Ben did his best to imitate him and said it right back to him!

As Mother's Day approaches I can't help but think about how lucky I am to have the kids I do. They are worth every difficult thing I have ever had to endure. If my life would have been any easier I wouldn't have these three kids. If I wouldn't have been diagnosed with MS in 2000, I probably wouldn't have ever used any fertility methods and wouldn't have gotten pregnant with Nate and Spence. If we wouldn't have lost the boys we would have stopped at two and we wouldn't have the kids we have today. Nor would I appreciate them as much as I do. I love my kids, I love my husband and I love my life, I would do it all over again for them!

Dinosaur Bites

Jack does not like to eat his vegetables at dinnertime. We have tried just about everything to make him eat them. We have done four bites because he is four years old, eat it or you can't get up from the table, eat it so you can have dessert, expecting the food to be gone by the time we count to 3, you name it! For some reason asking him to take a giant dinosaur bite has been working. But, my question is this. Why does he take a giant dinosaur bite of something he doesn't like then hold it in his cheek like a chipmunk rather than just chewing it up and swallowing it? Why doesn't he understand that the sooner he swallows it, the sooner he won't taste it? When I was young my parents used to make me eat peas. I had popping them in my mouth, taking a big gulp of milk and swallowing without chewing down to an art. I have tried to give him some pointers, but he is not taking my advice.

Family Hug

When Jack was little Travis and I would hug while one of us held him. As soon as Jack started talking he coined the term 'family hug'. He cannot stand for Travis and I to hug without him. He comes running over and demands a family hug. He now wants to make sure that Ben and Lauren are included in the family hugs. I love watching Jack round everyone up when Travis gets home from work so we can have a family hug. Someday he may regret coming up with the family hug, because this is one family tradition I will never let go of, no matter how old the kids get!

Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Big Boy and Girl Beds

As we were preparing Ben and Lauren's room for their new beds Lauren started crying for no apparent reason. Jack told me that she was crying because she was so happy about getting a big girl bed, "you know mom, sometimes people cry when they are happy". We just put them to bed; Ben is currently crying at the door to their room, it must be because he is so happy about his new bed.

Bye, Bye, Baby Bed

Last night I went to Wal-Mart and purchased two of the cheapest toddler beds I could find. I thought about ignoring the fact that Lauren was trying to climb out of her crib, but I figured I couldn't plead ignorance if she fell on her head since I blogged about it yesterday. Last night Travis put together one of the beds and this morning I cleaned out Ben and Lauren's closet. I gave Anne a bag of girl clothes this morning at playgroup and have a bag of boy clothes to pass on to my nephew. Why is it so hard for me to part with the cribs? The clothes I am happy to get rid of, but I have this feeling that I shouldn't get rid of the cribs. What if we need them again? Part of me is thrilled to be leaving yet another stage of babyhood, while the other part of me is saying "are you sure you don't want just one more?” I long for the day when my family is old enough to go skiing, white water rafting, parasailing, snorkeling, hiking and various other adventure type vacations. But, on the other hand I fear leaving this comfortable baby stage that I have grown to love. I am watching my 7-month-old nephew for the weekend in a couple weeks. I am thinking this is just what I need to clear things up in my mind. This will either be more than I want to handle on a regular basis or it will make me what another kid more than ever. I guess only time will tell.

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Here Comes Trouble

This morning when I went to get Ben and Lauren out of their cribs I found Lauren with her skinny little leg swung over her rail. She was stuck, but it is only a matter of time before she lands on her head. When Jack saw her he exclaimed, "Good girl, you are trying to get out of your cage". I wonder if he tells his teachers that we keep the babies in cages. Lauren is also able to stand on her tiptoes and reach doorknobs, but she can't quite get them turned. Ben is a little taller than her, but he doesn't really try to reach the doorknobs. It is only a matter of time before Lauren is the ringleader for her own trouble tag team. Being able to get out of their cribs and open doors is going to open a whole new world for the destruction duo.

Monday, May 7, 2007

C'mon Get Happy!

When my kids are acting cranky for no particular reason I often sing 'C'mon Get Happy' by the Partridge Family or I tell them to get glad in the same pants they are sad in. Anyway, I am happy to report that I have gotten glad about the art auction. I got a chance to talk to my uncle today and he thought the auction went okay and he would be happy to do it again next year. MOPS ended up making about $2000 before our expenses, so we will be able to operate for a whole year. Not to mention how happy I am with all of our new art. My uncle told a story at the auction about buying art that brings you enjoyment. Travis and I bought an oil that has been bringing me enjoyment every time I look at it. The painting is hanging in our family room above our fireplace. I get to look at this beautiful painting every time I sit on my couch or stand in my kitchen. How can I be upset when I look at this great painting?

Sunday, May 6, 2007

Happy Gradulations

Our babysitter is graduating from high school this year. I am not sure what we will do! She has watched our kids since we moved. As a matter of fact, she babysat for us when it was just one kid. When Ben and Lauren were newborns she brought a friend a couple times to help her until she got used to taking care of all of them. Her parents credit us for a lifetime worth of birth control. She tells her parents how tired she is after an evening with our kids, but she is great with them and they love her! Travis picked up some pearls for her graduation gift while he was in China. Jack practiced saying "Happy Graduation" over and over before she arrived. When she finally came to the door Jack froze up and said "Happy Gradulations!" then sheepishly turned to me and asked "did I say it wrong?” It was so cute!

I have realized that I haven't posted much about Ben. He doesn't talk, so he doesn't say funny things like Jack and he doesn't have near the attitude that provokes a blog like Lauren. Benny is currently my pleaser. He is always quick to smile and give kisses, unlike his sister who is currently saving her kisses for a rainy day, or possibly marriage. He loves to dance to any music, especially when I sing "There was a mommy, had a boy and Benny was his namo, B-E-N-N-Y, B-E-N-N-Y, B-E-N-N-Y, and Benny was his namo". He is my go to kid if I am feeling down because I can be guaranteed a smile and a kiss. I love looking into his brown eyes and wondering if that is what my grandma saw when she looked into my dad's little brother's eyes. Steve died at about Ben's age of Leukemia; I can't imagine how my grandparents dealt with losing him. I am certain I wouldn't be as strong as they were, which is just one of the many reasons I admire them!

Going, Going, Gone

Yesterday was the MOPS art auction. I would say the best part about it was sitting around the kitchen table afterwards drinking wine with Trisha and Travis and bitching about the rest of the group. I was horribly disappointed with the turnout. Of our 54 members only 15-20 came and only three (including myself) brought anyone from outside the group like I requested. I am so tired of people complaining about our dues, yet they aren't willing to do anything about it. As usual, a very small percentage of our group put a lot of work into our fundraiser while the remainder sat back and relaxed. Fortunately, we had some big spenders in our small group and we made some money. I feel bad that my uncle worked so hard for so little, I am going to have to owe him big!

Friday, May 4, 2007

Miss Priss

This morning I put Lauren's bloomers on before her dress. The girl had a fit! She started pulling off her bloomers and yelling dress, dress. I guess she thought I was going to send her to MOPPETS in just bloomers. She was very happy once she realized that she would be wearing the dress that has TWO matching bows. As soon as she saw the dress she started hitting both sides of her head saying "bows, bows" meaning that she wanted pig tails. She whimpers while I brush her hair, but as soon as I am done she says "cheese" like she is ready to have her picture taken!

Thursday, May 3, 2007

Take This Job And Shove It!

Travis officially quit his job this morning. It went very smoothly and his boss was understanding of his need to move on for greater opportunity. I am very proud of him taking this leap to better himself for the good of his family!

We were running late to drop Jack off at school so I didn't get Ben and Lauren dressed before we left. I then went to the grocery store with two babies with breakfast still on their jammies. I figured the positive would be that I wouldn't have to deal with all the people coming up to me and telling me what beautiful children I have and asking annoying questions about twins or telling me that their second cousin's, third husband's brother has a twin. I didn't have to deal with that, but the dirty babies attracted a whole new kind of freak. We were spotted by this black woman with a crazy look in her eye. She reminded me of Whoopi Goldberg's character in Ghost, what was her name? She came up and asked if they were twins and I said yes. She then asked if she could touch them. What do you say to that? I wanted to say no and run away, but instead we ended up standing in the produce section with a crazy woman with her hands on my kids’ bed head. Weird.

Safe

Last night a tornado touched down just east of us, there was rotation just a couple of miles from us and 100 mph winds in our backyard. I gathered the twins from their cribs as Travis rounded up Jack and we headed for the closet under the stairs. We played catch with Ben and Lauren's stuffed animals, which then turned into a game of throwing it at each other's heads. As all three of my kids giggled, I looked into my husband's eyes and felt so safe knowing that we were all together.

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Great News!


Jack: Mommy, mommy, I have great news! I was looking in the mirror and guess what? I can roll my tongue!
Me: Well...not exactly.

Back To Reality

Back to life, back to reality
Back to life, back to reality
Back to life, back to reality
Back to the here and now yeah
Show me how; decide what you want from me
Tell me maybe I could be there for you
However do you want me,
However do you need me
How, however do you want me,
However do you need me.
However do you want me,
However do you need me
How, however do you want me,
However do you need me.
Back to life, back to the present time,
Back from a fantasy yeah
Tell me now, take the initiative
I'll leave it in your hands until you're ready oh

I have had this song in my head all day. Anytime the kids start acting crazy I think to myself "back to reality", then this En Vogue song starts running through my head again. Now it is in your head too, sorry about that!

Lauren has been frantically asking me for gnocchi. I found this particularly odd because Trisha's step mom ordered it at a couple of the restaurants we went to in Santa Fe. I have discovered Lauren's definition of gnocchi is milk. I guess her tastes aren't that sophisticated after all.

As we were getting ready to go to our playdate this morning Lauren threw herself on the floor and started crying for no specific reason. I kept calling her and asking her to put her shoes on. I guess I finally started to annoy Jack.
Jack: Mom, she will be down when she is done throwing her fit, just let it go
Me: What is she throwing a fit about?
Jack: Who knows?
Me: Come on Lauren, let's go!
Jack: Mom, she still has her fit on, give her a minute
Me: We are already late we need to go
Jack: Mom, I will go get her and tell her to turn her frown upside down and turn it into a smile
(From the steps) thump, thump, thump...cry
Jack: (running to the stairs) Mom, I heard a thump, thump, thump from the steps, emergency, I think Lauren fell, now she is really sad!

The playdate today was great. It was really relaxing. I just love hanging out with Anne. She is the kind of person that I can just hang out with and not talk if I don't have anything to say. It was just Jack and Elsie today the other girl didn't come. Everything was super until right before we left and the kids argued a little. In the car on the way home we had the following conversation:
Jack: Elsie was really nasty to me today.
Me: What did she do?
Jack: She told me I was never going to be her friend again.
Me: I am sure she didn't mean that sweetie; she gave you a hug and told you she loved you before you left.
Jack: I don't get girls.
Me: Me neither.
I am afraid this is just the beginning of me not being able to give Jack advice on girls. I don't get other females. I can only hope that Lauren turns out like me, so I will get her!

The art auction is less than a week away and I am really starting to get nervous. If the Mavs win the next game, game 7 will be on Saturday night. This could be a real problem when it comes to getting the husbands to attend. I am really hoping that they lose! I don't think the rest of the women in this group have any idea how important this is. If it doesn't work out, we have zero funds to spend next semester. I really don't know how we will make ends meet. Not to mention my uncle is the auctioneer, I don't want to waste his time. This is a lot of pressure!

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Busier Than A One Legged Man In An Ass Kicking Contest




When I was working there were many times that I would take time off then kick myself when I got back because it was more hassle than it was worth. Luckily, this was a great trip, but this is definitely a huge hassle. Trisha and I got home Sunday evening at around 9pm and this is the first time since then that I have been able to sit down and blog. For those of you who have been waiting for me to post to know that I made it home safe and sound you can official breath a sigh of relief!

Yesterday morning I got up early because I knew we had a busy day ahead of us. First thing, Travis hit me with "I am golfing today and my khaki pants are dirty, can you wash and press them for me, I will be home for lunch". Apparently, he has forgotten what it is like to play catch up. I immediately started doing laundry so he would have clean pants and I could unpack. This is when I stumble upon two very cute, very pizza stained white shirts in the laundry. Travis had fed Ben and Lauren pizza in white shirts, and then didn't bother to treat them or wash them. I then spent several additional minutes, which I didn't have, scrubbing shirts. After I got the laundry going I sat down to my computer to send an email to work requesting hours for the week. I had over 50 emails regarding work, MOPS, the art auction, you name it. After getting all of that sorted out I did more laundry. When the kids woke up I crammed some breakfast down their throats, pressed Trav's pants, frantically prepared for the cleaning lady, then we jumped into the car to get a birthday present for the party Jack had at 10am. We got to Chuck E. Cheese just in time for the party with a gift in hand. Lauren and Ben made a great pair. Lauren preferred to put the money in the ride and walk away and Ben preferred to ride. There is a reason they serve alcohol in casinos, if they didn't the constant dinging would drive you right out of there. This is what it is like at Chuck E. Cheese, except the alcohol is replaced by 3 kids asking for more tokens. Kill me now! After the party we stopped at the grocery store to pick up some necessities. It was out of the question for Travis to have to go to the grocery store with 3 kids while I was gone, as if it is a walk in the park for me! We got home, I put all the kids in bed and I quickly unloaded groceries and grabbed a bite to eat before Trisha arrived to watch the babies while I took Jack back to the ENT. Jack was not pleased about being woken up only 45 minutes into his nap. As he was crying on the way to the doctor I was trying to explain the benefits of a power nap. He didn't buy into it! We spent a little over an hour at the doctor finding out that the fluid in Jack's ears has gone down, but hasn't disappeared. So, he still can't hear; we are going to go back in a month, if the fluid isn't gone by then he is going to get tubes. We got home and said good-bye to Ms. Trisha then I sat down to do the 3 hours of work I had committed to. Trisha wasn't gone 30 seconds when our annoying neighbors came over to give Lauren a bunch of crap that she had cleaned out of her room. She brought over countless plastic necklaces, bracelets and ugly bows and headbands. Just what I need is a bunch of their clutter as I am trying to pick up for the cleaning lady. They just stayed and stayed. I finally had to kick them out after a half hour. I worked quickly, then fed the kids dinner (Trav was golfing) as I continued to pick up the house. I spent the entire evening washing and putting away laundry. This morning I was up early to make last minute preparations for the cleaning lady, put together an agenda for the MOPS steering meeting I was running this morning, prepare a present for our host and hostess in Santa Fe and make lunch for Jack to take to school. As soon as I got home from the meeting I worked, when I was done with that I picked up Jack from school, which brings us to right now.

Okay, wake up, I know that was boring, but it is my life! Our trip was fantastic. We arrived on Thursday evening, as we were getting our rental car Travis called to tell me that Lauren had a fever. I am so glad she waited to get sick until I was already gone so I wouldn't have to feel guilty about leaving anyway. We had fabulous dinners, actually it wasn't just dinner, we ate great! Trisha's dad and step mom were so welcoming and warm. Thursday night I had a very interesting experience with Trisha's dad. He is a very spiritual individual and we spent a long while talking about Nate and Spence. It felt really good to talk everything out! Friday we shopped and shopped, then went to a real estate event Trisha's parents were hosting for their company. The houses were really nice, but I couldn't believe the price. The closest house to our home was 3100 sq ft with four bedrooms for $889,000. We have over 600 more sq ft than that. Wow, the cost of living there is high! They had beautiful trails on their property, which allowed me to play with my camera. It was so relaxing to just concentrate on things I wanted to do! Saturday we shopped and ate some more and Sunday was more of the same, what could be sweeter?