Why I Walk...

Every hour of every day, someone is diagnosed with MS. My hour was in December of 2000. I started feeling symptoms when I was about 15 years old. I was having knee and hip pain, but the doctors attributed my pain to my competitive swimming. The pain continued throughout high school and college. My mom paraded me in front of every doctor she could think of in search of an answer. It wasn't until I started having numbness in my legs and hands that Travis and I googled my symptoms and found MS. We requested an MRI from my primary care physician who didn't think it was necessary but patronized me and ordered the test. After the MRI the doctor coldly called me at work and dropped the life-changing bomb. But, that's not why I registered for the MS Walk and that's not why I'm asking you to support my fund raising efforts with a tax-deductible donation.

I walk for my husband and my kids. When Travis and I got married we had big dreams. We dreamed of working hard, saving for retirement and enjoying our hard work by traveling the world. When we married, we didn't know my fate. I feel horribly guilty that Travis may not be able to live out his dreams because I am disabled. My kids didn't ask for this. I want to be able to continue to be active and play with them rather than watch them from a wheelchair. They deserve a mom that can drive them to school and practice, not a mommy who is blind due to MS. I give the kids 400 units of vitamin D on a daily basis in hopes of preventing this fate in them. Please visit my website and make a donation.

The National Multiple Sclerosis Society is dedicated to ending the devastating effects of MS but they can't do it without our help. It's faster and easier than ever to support this cause that's so important to me.

Any amount, great or small, helps to make a difference in the lives of people with MS. I appreciate your support!

If you would like more information about the National Multiple Sclerosis Society, how proceeds from the MS Walk are used, or the other ways you can get involved in the fight against MS, please visit nationalmssociety.org.

As you know I don't show my kids faces on this blog, but when you show your support by clicking on this link to make a donation you will receive a special treat and see a full frontal picture (get your mind out of the gutter, our faces!) of my family.

Barf-O-Rama Part II

I stayed up late last night finishing the last of Jack's birthday invitations so he could pass them out at school today (he is inviting everyone in the class). But, this morning I was awaken at 5:30am by Jack crying from his bed. When I stepped into his room I was nearly knocked over by the unmistakable stench of puke. We aren't just talking a little and it was in his top bunk (the up bed as Jack calls it). If you have ever tried to change the sheets on a top bunk in the corner of the room you are currently feeling my pain. Luckily Travis was home still so he was able to start the bath for Jack while I got the sheets in the washer. As soon as I took over Travis bailed mumbling something about needing to get something done at work before 8am. I feel so bad for Jack, today is the teddy bear tea party at school that he has been looking forward to and tonight is Desserts with Dad (the kids show their dads the classroom and have dessert and what not). So, do I tell him that he will be missing the tea party and dessert or do I just wait for him to ask about it? Poor me; no school, no gym, no passing out the super cool birthday invitations, no going to the store to replenish the supply of diapers (Ben and Lauren slept in Pull-Ups because we are completely out!), no nothing. Since I won't be told how cool the invitations are from the other parents at school I have posted it so y'all can tell me how great it is!

Sweet Little Lies

I got an email from Jack's teacher saying that they needed empty water bottles for a project they had planned. As you know I have not been drinking soda so I am now on the bottled water bandwagon. I collected several bottles for Jack to take to school yesterday. When he got home from school we had the following conversation.

Me: Did you give your teacher the water bottles?
Jack: Yep
Me: Does she still need more?
Jack: My teacher told me that we need to collect chocolate bar wrappers.
Me: Well, we won't be able to help her with that.
Jack: Why not?
Me: Because we don't eat chocolate bars.
Jack: We could start.
Me: Does your teacher really need chocolate bar wrappers?
Jack: No, it was a little fib, but it was worth a try.

What Part Of No Don't You Understand?

Me: Lauren, will you take your clothes to the hamper?
Lauren: (shaking her head from side to side) Uh-uh
Me: Oh, you don't get to say no to mommy!
Lauren: I didn't say no.
Me: Then go do it.
Lauren: I said "uh-uh"

M.I.A.

I missed a few days of posting because honestly I haven't been able to think. I saw Dr. Oz on Oprah the other day issuing a challenge to give up soda (pop for all of my Yankee readers) for two weeks. He claims that giving up soda will make your stomach flatter in two weeks because you don't have the carbonation bloating you. This is yet another thing that makes some sense to me. I am very competitive; I can't pass up a challenge. It's official I am on the wagon. I haven't had a soda for 39 hours. I had the worst headache yesterday I could hardly see, this morning I woke up feeling like I had a horrible hangover, but I only had one glass of wine with dinner. I went to the gym this morning and knock on wood I don't have a headache. Maybe I am through the worst of it. I will be reporting on my flat stomach in two weeks!

Barf-O-Rama

When I picked the kids up at Kids Klub at the gym they had Lauren quarantined in the empty infant area. They said that Lauren had just decided to lie down on the floor and shut her eyes, so they assumed she was sick. They didn't bother to come get me because they knew my class would be over soon. When I picked her up I was so hot that I couldn't tell if she was feverish or not. She told me that her stomach hurt, but I didn't think much of it assuming that she was hungry since it was dinnertime. We were planning to go out to dinner but after discovering that she did have a fever of 101.8 we decided to stay home. As soon as I got the kids’ dinner on the table Lauren threw up all over the kitchen floor. I cleaned up the floor, gave Lauren a bath then washed the towels I used for clean up. When I got done I gave the boys a bath too, by the time I finished with them Lauren had thrown up again. So, I cleaned up the floor, gave Lauren a bath then washed the towels I used for clean up...AGAIN. I think Lauren could tell that I wasn't enjoying the whole process and told me "I am sorry my tummy made a mess on your floor". After getting everyone to bed we had a little over an hour before she threw up again. We heard a little cough then a little person up and around so I went upstairs to investigate. Lauren met me at her door caked in puke and said "Mommy, look at my bed, Benny did it". Wow, either Ben was able to get up out of his bed, throw up all over Lauren and her bed without getting any on himself then get back in bed and fall asleep before I got up to their room or Lauren has been taking lying lessons from Jack. Since Ben is unable to eat a bowl of applesauce without having it in his ears, between his toes and all over his clothes I am assuming it is the later. How did I get so lucky to have two advanced children? It must be good genes!

The Destruction Duo Strikes AGAIN!

Clean up, clean up,
Everybody everywhere
Clean up, clean up,
Everybody do their share

Clean up, clean up
I can't find them anywhere
Clean up, clean up
I guess I have to do their share

Clean up, clean up
This is easier anyway
Clean up, clean up
They just get in the way

Clean up, clean up
I wonder how long this will last
Clean up, clean up
I bet they will mess it up fast

Clean up, clean up
The cleaning is finally done
Clean up, clean up
Kids are here to have some fun

These pictures don't fully describe the mess I found this morning. Ben and Lauren pulled all of the clothes out of their drawers (you will see them strewn between the beds), cleared all the books off the shelves, threw all the hangers they could reach on the floor of the closet and emptied all the toy bins. I couldn't even walk in their room! We are having friends over for dinner tonight, I would have left a little mess knowing that it will just get messier tonight, but there wasn't even any room left to play. I feel like Henny Penny when it comes to cleaning the kids rooms, they disappear until it is cleaned up, then they come back to enjoy the clean space.

It's Not Easy Being A Mom

One of the best things about having twins is having them both sitting on your lap at the same time getting twice the love. One of the worst things about having twins is having them battle for position while sitting on your lap. Ben and Lauren would like nothing more than to have me to themselves. They start out by casually touching each other in attempts to annoy the other, which then becomes more and more violent kicks, hits and bites. I am often caught in the crossfire while they are battling it out. When the spat becomes an all out brawl with screaming, crying, spiting, etc. I usually just get up so nobody gets to sit on my lap. Tonight as the evening battle was getting underway I over heard Jack tell Travis "It's hard being a mom, I can tell!”

If Soda Is Fat, I Don't Want To Be Thin!

I have bad news. The diet soda I live on is making me fat. Saying that I live on this soda is not an exaggeration. I have at least two in the morning to get myself going. One for lunch, one when the kids have a snack so I am less tempted to eat. One for dinner and one while I am watching TV/screwing around on my computer at night. It has been a long time since I have done a story problem, but according to my math that is 2+1+1+1+1=6 per day and that is at a minimum. Throw in a car ride or time to sit and hang out with friends and I have more. I am an addict. I have heard the study before that says that diet soda makes you eat more because the artificial sweetener makes your body crave sugar or the one that says you eat more because you feel like you deserve it since you are drinking diet soda. Those studies are a load of shit! I don't buy that at all. However, I am afraid there is a new study that might make sense to me. I saw it on Good Morning America the other day. Basically, this study says that when you eat or drink something with artificial sweetener (diet soda, Yoplait Light, etc.) the sweet taste makes your body think it will be receiving calories and when it doesn't your metabolism gets messed up. Now, what? Is there a patch for diet soda addicts? A chewing gum that releases caffeine into your system? Perhaps there is a rehab facility for me and the millions of others who suffer from this affliction. Are my friends and family going to host an intervention?

Liar, Liar, Pants On Fire

I just saw a study on Good Morning America that said the average 4 year old lies once every two hours and the average 6 year old lies every hour and a half. So, Jack will be five in a month, so that means he should only be lying every hour and 45 minutes. I guess if I stopped asking him questions he would only be lying every 2 hours or so. But, he and I have conversations like this at least every 20 minutes:

Me: Jack, did you hit your sister?
Jack: Nope.

Me: What are you doing?
Jack: Nothing.

Me: What happened?
Jack: I don't know.

Me: Do you have your socks on?
Jack: Yep.
Me: Okay, let's go!
Jack: I don't have my socks on yet.

Me: Why is Benny crying?
Jack: Lauren must have hit him.

Me: Are you done with your breakfast?
Jack: Yes.
Me: Whose waffle is this?
Jack: Mine.

And these are just the lies I heard this morning before school. Just when I was starting to think that I have failed as a mother again because my kid is a liar the study mentions that lying is part of a child's development. So, I guess my kid is advanced, right?

Where Did I Go Wrong?

Today I took the kids to Kroger to pick up a couple of quick things and decided to give their childcare a try. I had heard good things, the best of which is that I don't have to shop with my kids. As soon as Ben and Jack saw the toys they were off! But, Lauren froze up. She freaked out and decided she wanted to shop with me rather than stay with Ms. JJ. As Lauren and I walked away she asked where Jack was and I reminded her that he was playing with Ben and Ms. JJ, the girl flipped out. She cried and cried. She was inconsolable. I walked through the store calmly explaining that she had made her choice and that I didn't want to listen to her crying. I noticed an old woman giving me the evil eye, but I stuck to my guns and kept telling Lauren that she could play next time, but she had already made her choice to shop with me today. Thank goodness I only had a few things to buy so I didn't have to push the screaming banshee through the store for too long. We arrived at the check out right before the old woman with the scathing looks.

Check out girl: (to Lauren) are you having a bad day?
Rude old woman (ROW): I think she is sick!
Me: No, she isn't sick, she made a bad choice. She chose to shop with me instead of play in the childcare with her brothers, but after we walked away she wished she had stayed to play.
ROW: Well, how old is she?
Me: She is 2 and a half.
ROW: She is too young to make choices!

Excuse me you old bitty, who asked you? You are at least 80 years old; your mothering days are over! I didn't even know what to say to her so I politely turned toward the checker and finished my transaction. She has apparently forgotten what it is like to be a mother of preschoolers. It made me so angry. I am really doing the best I can! I think at 30 months old I need to start teaching my kids that there are consequences to everything. Travis was just telling me yesterday that I am too easy on Ben and Lauren, then the nosey old bitch made me feel like mommy dearest. It was so much easier when it was just Jack. Now I am suddenly the worst mother in the world. I don't know what the right thing is. I just know I love my kids so much and I don't want to screw this motherhood thing up! Whose right Travis or the nasty old rag?

Experiment

This morning all was going well. I woke up about 7:30, the kids were still sleeping so I got to take an uninterrupted shower AND shave my legs. Life was good! The kids woke up around 8am and immediately started demanding breakfast. "I want waffles!” "I want pancakes!", "I want cereal!". I don't remember 'short order cook' being part of my job description when I applied to be a stay at home mom, but somehow it happened. I opened the freezer to get the waffles and pancakes. You caught me; I don't make waffles or pancakes from scratch. When I opened the freezer I was greeted with a full single serving red Gatorade. Unfortunately, it wasn't contained in the bottle if you know what I mean!

Me: Who put this Gatorade in the freezer?
Jack: It was me mom, I was doing a little experiment. What happened to it?
Me: (rather testy) come see what happened!
Jack: (looking in the freezer) It exploded...
Me: Yes, it did. Now, who is going to clean this up?
Jack: You?
Me: That's what I was afraid of. Next time you do an experiment, do it in your own freezer.
Jack: I don't have a freezer.
Me: Exactly.

Tastes Like Chicken!

Last night as I was putting the chicken, I had just spent an hour preparing, into the oven Travis called to let me know that he had to go to dinner with some higher ups (affectionately called "The Frenchies") who were in from France. I called a couple friends to see if they would like to enjoy the chicken with the kids and I, but one had sick kids and the other had already eaten.

Jack: This is the best chicken I have ever tasted!
Me: Thanks!
Jack: Too bad daddy wasn't here.
Me: Yep, you will have to tell him what he missed out on.
Jack: How did you make this chicken?
Me: I put lots of spices on it and put it in the oven.
Jack: No, I mean what did you make it out of?
Me: A chicken and spices.
Jack: No, what kind of animal did you use?
Me: A chicken
Jack: You mean with feathers and a beak? Bok, Bok, Bok?
Me: Well by the time I bought it at the store it didn't have feathers or a beak, but yes.
Jack: Yuck!

Twins Are Swell

I love having twins. Ben and Lauren are so fun to watch. You normally don't see two-year-olds interacting, at this age they are still doing parallel play. But, when you have twins they grow up side by side and love to play together. I love to listen to them first thing in the morning; it usually goes something like this:

Ben: Wake up Lolo
Lauren: Morning Benny
Ben: Let's play!
Lauren: Otay

They will play happily by themselves for at least 30 minutes every morning while I catch a few more winks of sleep. I will admit it isn't all rainbows and lollipops; what usually gets me out of bed is when someone is crying because they have been hit, kicked or bit.

Today they were playing 'this little piggy went to market' which sounds a little like this:

Lauren: (touching each of Ben's toes) Piggy, piggy, piggy, home, wee wee wee. My turn now, do it to me Benny!
Ben: (touching each of Lauren's toes) Piggy, piggy, piggy, home, wee wee wee.

Then they laugh and laugh.

They also like to play 'peek-a-boo'. Lauren can say it correctly, but Ben still says, "Pick boo".

The best part of the day was when I over heard Lauren saying, "I love you Benny" and Ben responding, "I love you too". It wasn't even prompted! I have never heard them say that to each other before, what a great first! Days like today make me feel sorry for people that will never experience this!

I Am Cool, This Award Proves It!

I must say that before I started blogging I imagined all bloggers except my friend Anne, whom I know (and love) personally, looked like this! Now that I am a full-fledged blogger I know how cool bloggers can be! Thanks for the award Vasquez3 you rock my blogging world! So, time to pass this cool award on...drum roll please...and the winners are Anne at Bun In The Oven, Lisa at Life With Our Little Ladies and Karen at Lyrics of my Life. You ladies are as cool as me, thus deserving of this award!

Love Like Relationship

Jack has been trying to prove his love for me lately by telling me things like...

Mom, I love you to the moon and around the world and too the moon again and around the world and around the world!

Mom, I love you more than I love Dad and Ben and Lauren.

Mom, I love you more than Ben does.

Mom, I love you more than Lauren does.

Mom, I love you more than Daddy does.

I love your kisses more than ________. (Fill in the blank with anything that a 4-year-old can not live without)

All very sweet, but there is one that I am still trying to decide if it is good or not. I tied Jack's shoes for him and he thanked me by saying:

You are the best mom in the whole world! I like you more than I love you.

Hmmm, is that good or not?

Benisms

Awhile back I posted a list of Laurenisms and now that Ben is talking more and more it is time for a list of Benisms.

Otty Dokey Dokey = ok
Iwanasitlapma? = Can I sit in your lap mom?
Tunetune Network = Cartoon Network
milkymama = More milk please
I talk Grammy? = Can we call Grammy?
Boot On = No, I am not going to wear the shoes you are trying to put on me. Please get my boots and I will happily get ready to go.
Dego = Diego
Poopoo = Penis (I think this is my fault, he always cries when I try to wipe his penis after he poops so I say "give me a minute baby, I have to get the poopoo off")
DADAHOME!!! = Daddy's home!
readbookme? = Will you read me a book?
Me tuck = I'm stuck!
Chalk it = Chocolate
Ticky, knee wipe = I'm sticky, I need wipes.
Ma knee help me = Mom, I need help.
Me gotit = I've got it (aka I don't want your help)
Pock Crn Ickin = Popcorn Chicken
Ho Bunch = Whole Bunch (often used when asking for a snack)

Benny doesn't enunciate as well as Lauren which has helped he and I develop a close relationship since I am the only person who can understand him. Hopefully this list will help others, like his father, understand him better!

Game Over

On the other side of the wall on the right side of the staircase is our game room. Our old loveseat sits against the half wall. The kids watch cartoons, jump in the ball pit and play with their train table in the game room. The furniture was in great shape before we put it up there. The kids climb on it, jump off it, pull the cushions off and make forts out of it. I would say the only thing they don't do is sit nicely on it. The furniture has attached cushions that are pulling away from the frame leaving stuffing exposed. Today as I was scurrying around the house preparing for the cleaning ladies Ben and Lauren were hanging out upstairs. I started up the back stairs to put a load of laundry away and this is what I found...
Me: What are you babies doing?
Ben: Nothing.
Lauren: (running from the game room) Playing in my room!
Me: Why are you pulling my couch apart?
Lauren: Benny did it.
Ben: No, Lolo did it.
Me: I know you both did it. Lauren why did you do that?
Lauren: We were playing snowing.

So they were pulling the stuffing out of my couch, dropping it over the half wall onto the stairs to make 'snow'. No, I don't think I like this game, not one little bit!

Happy Mardi Gras!

Dear Lauren,
Yes, it is Mardi Gras, but no we don't live in New Orleans.
And No, there will not be any beads!
So, please put your dress down and leave it down from this point forward.
Love,
Mommy

Wanna Hear A Dirty Story?

My grandpa always used to ask "Wanna hear a dirty story?" If you answered yes he would exclaim, "The little boy fell in the mud!" and laugh and laugh. I couldn't help but remember grandpa's joke this afternoon.

I was out running errands before preschool pick up today. In a matter of 20 minutes the winds picked up and the temperature dropped from 80 to 62 degrees. It poured rain and I was able to get home just in time for the hail to start. It rained hard for almost an hour. I was feeling lucky that the rain had stopped as I walked into school to pick up Jack. As Jack and I headed to the car he ran ahead, I yelled, "don't go in the street without me!” It was like watching him in slow motion as he tried to stop in the muddy grass. His foot went in the air like a cartoon character slipping on a banana peel. He fell on his ass in the mud. He started to whimper as he got on his hands and knees to stand up again. He slipped again and fell flat on his stomach in his white shirt. He started to cry until he looked up at me and saw me laughing. It was better than watching an episode of the Three Stooges. Jack started to laugh too, which made it harder for him to stand up. The wind was blowing, Jack was laughing as he made his second attempt to stand up. He fell down again. When we got to the car I made Jack hide between the cars so I could strip his muddy clothes off before he got in my car.

Pop Quiz

You Should Be a Manager

You're very organized, motivated, and methodical. Fair and objective, you can see all sides of a conflict. You are a good mediator. You are task oriented. You do well with deadlines and schedules. And while you can be a task master at times, you're good at managing people and listening to their input. You do best when you: - Must have attention to detail - Are in charge of people You would also be a good accountant or personal assistant.

What Should You Be When You Grow Up?

So I found this quiz on my bloggy friend Sexy Housewife's blog. I often take the quizzes I find online, don't ask me why, I know they are lame. But this one I have to say is on the mark. I should be a manager, I am best when I have attention to detail and am in charge of people. It didn't mention the age of the people, but I will have to say I manage a force of 3 (4 if you count Travis). "Fair and objective, you can see all sides of a conflict. You are a good mediator." I see all sides of the conflicts by using the eyes in the back of my head and I have perfected my mediation "give her that toy back so she will stop crying", that counts, right? As far as I am concerned it should have said, "You should be a Stay-At-Home Mom!”

Musical Family

I admit it, I listen to rap and pop on the radio with the kids in the car. I figure if it is on the radio they will hear "radio edit" instead of the naughty word. When we are home and I have a CD on I have been know to go running to the stereo to manually beep out a naughty word. I wonder if Ben and Lauren have been hearing too much rap. They have made up their own song from two of their favorites, though they are different genres, I think it works. What do you think?

Go Diego,
Go Diego,
It's your birthday,
Go Diego
Uh, uh, uh

Yesterday Ben locked the bathroom door so Jack couldn't get in. I got the door unlocked, then had this conversation with Jack.

Jack: Mom, how did you get the door unlocked?
Me: Magic.
Jack: Is that why the police sang a song about you?
Me: What?
Jack: You know "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic"
Me: Ohhhhh, The Police, sure whatever.
Jack: Well daddy said the song is about you.