Shit Happens

I don't swear a lot...well, I usually use words that replace the swear word like "eff", "mother of pearl", "biznatch", "Judas Priest", "cheese and rice" you get the idea. The one word that I haven't found a replacement for is shit. I don't know why but that one always slips out. For some reason anytime something bad happens that is the first thing out of my mouth. I usually say it under my breath, but I will admit it is said. And I guess the kids are hearing it. Jack knows that shit is an adult word, but Ben and Lauren haven't quite mastered that concept. They were trying it out on each other this morning. I don't want to make a huge deal out of it for fear that they will use it for shock value, but at the same time I can't have them trying to impress their classmates on the first day of preschool this fall. As I was going over my parenting strategy in my head this morning I received the following email:

THE MOST FUNCTIONAL ENGLISH WORD

Well, it's shit. That’s right, shit!
Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.
You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit, and tell others to eat shit.
Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference between shit and shineola.
There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bullshit, horseshit, and chicken shit.
You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when the shit hits the fan.
You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.
You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.
Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit, and some days are just plain shitty.
Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times when you feel like shit.
You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit or a lot of weird shit.
You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit creek without a paddle.
Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.
When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of the English language.
And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything else!!
You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't give a shit!
Well, Shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give a shit and hope you had a nice day, without a bunch of shit. But, if you happened to catch a load of shit from some shit-head...
Well, Shit Happens!!!