Mortality

Last night our 38-year-old pediatrician and neighbor had a major heart attack. From what I am told it was just one step below instantly fatal. He lived through the heart attack, but will still be in the hospital for at least three days. His wife is a nurse so when he started feeling sick they were trying to handle it at home. Until his arm started hurting, that’s when he knew he was having a heart attack. They called 911, and then he looked at his wife and told her he was going to die and said he loved her. Thank goodness he made it through, he has a two-year-old daughter that needs him. Not to mention Benny (he doesn't know anything about the heart attack) who told me this afternoon that he needed me to call the doctor because his "breath hurt". I didn't bother to mention that the doctor had bigger problems right now. It really makes me think about how old we are getting. People our age are actually dying of things other than accidents like they did when we were in our 20s. Our attorney who was "our" age passed away less than a year ago and now the kids’ doctor nearly died. It makes me worry about Travis, he doesn't exercise like he should and he is a giant ball of tension 95% of the time. I am really not prepared to do this three-kid thing without him. Not to mention, I kind of like to have him around!

Happy Pumpkin Station Day

Gone are the days of wearing your Halloween costume to school, participating in the Halloween parade and enjoying a Halloween cupcake. Today I, as room mother, will be facilitating the Kindergarten "pumpkin stations". That's right, you can't even celebrate Halloween in the public schools anymore! Why? I don't know. Whom does Halloween offend? Whose civil liberties are sacrificed by a Halloween party? I will never know! So, to get around the Halloween thing we celebrate fall by having "pumpkin stations" on Halloween, just don't say the 'H' word. We will have five stations; pumpkin decorating, Fall bingo, decorating pumpkin cookies, pumpkin bean bag toss and harvest mix graphing.

After the pumpkin station party I will be rushing my kids home to start Halloween. We are going to a Halloween party at a friend's house complete with a bounce house, bobbing for apples and costume contest. The party starts at 4pm, we will live it up as fast as we can, then rush home to meet neighbors for pizza before trick-or-treating at 5:30. Tomorrow we will be going to another family Halloween costume party. Jack and Ben will be Nebraska football players, Lauren will be a Nebraska cheerleader and I will be a Nebraska fan complete with a corn hat (on loan from my brother-in-law). I am still trying to convince Travis to be a fan with me, but he read the fine print on the invitation that said, "costumes are not required". Boring! Maybe Travis is the guy whose civil liberties are at risk. We no longer have Halloween parties in public schools to protect fun haters everywhere!

Training Wheels

We took another family bike ride yesterday. Since it was Saturday we had lots of time to explore the bike paths in our area. We had a great time. The weather was beautiful and the company was great! Jack is still riding the neighbor's 18" bike (without training wheels) and Travis pulls Ben and Lauren in the Burley Bee. Jack got whacked in the face with a tree branch and the tree pollen powdered his little allergy prone nose.

Jack: My nose is itchy!
Travis: Wipe it off.
Jack: I can't!
Travis: Why not?
Jack: I can't let go of my handlebars!
Travis: Yes you can, leave one hand on the handle and wipe your nose with the other hand, see watch me
Jack: Yeah, but you have training wheels! (referring to the trailer that Ben and Lauren ride in)

Sunday Dinner On Monday

Yesterday I made Hamburger Helper for dinner because I knew I would be cooking all day today. I thought about making two boxes, but decided that would be over kill. I was wrong. My family gobbled the cheap and easy meal like they would never eat again. Today I was taking dinner to a girlfriend who just had a baby. The poor girl breaks her tailbone each time she delivers so I knew it had to be a good meal. Not to mention the email that I got from the meal organizer that said "You know they are so glad to have this baby in the south! There is no better meal than a southern one!” Wow, that is a lot of pressure for a Yankee! I wasn't sure what to make. Most of my specialties are of the Tex-Mex variety, but I couldn't take those to my Hispanic friend's house! I finally decided on meat loaf, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and crescent rolls with Oreo cheesecake for dessert. I started with the cheesecake right after lunch, then spent the rest of the afternoon peeling potatoes, mixing meatloaf and putting together the beans. I figured I would be nice and treat my family to the same meal. Travis liked it. The kids on the other hand were unimpressed. I had to bribe them with the cheesecake to make them eat. Benny didn't even like the cheesecake, he asked me to "scrape the cheese off his cookies". Why is it when I put zero effort into dinner they can't get enough and when I bust my hump they are totally unimpressed?

Where Does The Time Go?

Yes, I realize I haven't posted since September 3rd. We have finally finished our third rental property and we are DONE renovating houses for several months! But, even more importantly Travis and I took our first vacation without the kids in two years!

No, we aren't wearing matching sunglasses. We both forgot our shades and had to purchase some "El Cheapos" (which is actually what the shop called them). We didn't realize how similar they were until we looked at the pictures!

Our friend Amy invited us to spend four days at her uncle's house in Cape Cod. It was a fabulous trip; we went on a whale watching tour. I hoped to catch a glimpse of a whale in the distance.

We actually saw several whales right off the bow of our boat. It was great!


Travis and Amy spent an afternoon golfing while I enjoyed some time reading ALONE at the beach! We even got to do some shopping and Travis tagged along like a real trooper. We had our meals without crying, carrying on or cutting food. But, as much as I enjoyed our time as a couple rather than a party of five I was happy to see my smiling children in their consolation sweatshirts!

Spiderman

3am. I was only in a partial sleep. Travis had been up several times clearing his throat and spitting. He was having trouble with his acid reflux. He said he was going to try to sleep upstairs in a chair. I grunted and took over his side of the bed, ahhhh.

Travis: You need to get up!
Lights flipped on.
Kelli: Okay, why?
Travis: There is a tarantula in the house!

I followed him out of our bedroom to the darkness of our entryway.

Travis: Look at the windowsill above the front door.
Me: That is Lauren's pink plastic spider. Jack threw it up there and I couldn't get it down. Good night.

I went back to bed. Travis didn't follow. I assumed that he went upstairs to go to sleep. When I got up this morning the pink plastic spider was on my kitchen counter. Apparently Travis could get it down and didn't think it could wait until daylight.

Kelli Hearts Travis

Travis and I celebrated our 11th anniversary last Saturday and as you know Sunday was Father's Day. I have started several drafts about how great Travis is but nothing seemed quite right. I wrote one that talked about all we have been through in the last 11 years, but it was pretty much the same post I did on our 10th anniversary. The last year has been good, but fairly uneventful so I didn't have much to add. Then I wrote a post about what a great dad he is and it ended up sounding cheesy and insincere. I am better at writing comedy, sarcasm and drama than writing about love and admiration. My friends Lisa and Anne write lovely things about their husbands. They usually move me to tears because I feel the same way, I am just awful and putting it into words. Travis got me a great card for our anniversary that sums up how I feel.

We've grown into this life (no doubt about that, we got engaged at 19 years old)
one day,
one challenge, (more than our fair share of challenges if you ask me)
one celebration at a time... (Luckily, we have had enough celebrations to make up for the challenges)

We've become a family
with a crazy, funny
runaround life.

We've built a home,
filled it with warmth and caring, (and kids)
made it a place
where love and
dreams can grow...

And it all begins
with love,
the love you give
every day.
I'm so thankful
for the life we share
and the happiness
we've found together.

How does Travis manage to find such great cards and I am only able to find lame cards with Garfield on them? Oh, I know! Travis doesn't go to Walmart for cards, he goes to Hallmark and he doesn't take 3 kids that are trying to beat each other into a coma.

What's For Dinner?

4:00pm Load the kids into the car and head to the gym.

4:30pm Gym class starts.

4:40pm Travis leaves a message on our home answering machine saying Pete is in town, but he has a work dinner so he might go out for a beer with him later.

5:30pm Gym class ends.

5:35pm Gather kids from the Kids Klub and load them up to head home.

5:40pm Travis leaves another message on our home answering machine saying that he is blowing off the work dinner and Pete is coming to our house for dinner at 6:30.

6:09pm I arrive home and listen to the answering machine to learn I am having dinner guests in 21 minutes.

I had 3 chicken breasts thawing for dinner...not enough to feed 6 people. Trav had to stop at the store for more food on his way home. The kids and I had a busy day so the house was a mess. I was drenched in sweat.

I barked orders at the kids to pick up toys, did a quick sweep of the kitchen and jumped in the shower. I don't think I will ever say this again, but thank goodness for rush hour traffic in Dallas! Pete was a little late so I managed to get the house presentable, shower, dry my hair and make an appetizer before he arrived. Just call me June Cleaver!

There's No Crying In Baseball

Last night was little league night at our local AA baseball team. This was the first game we have taken Ben and Lauren to and if I have my way, the last for several years. Jack got to stand on the field in his uniform during the national anthem. He did us proud and removed his hat and covered his heart with it just as we instructed. I sat down with the kids and Travis went to buy the traditional stadium hot dogs. The vendors were swarmed by hundreds of fathers doing the same thing. Meanwhile I was stuck herding cats. Ben went one way, Lauren would go the other as Jack got on and off his seat each time it flipped up it hit me in the funny bone. Two innings later Travis and the sacrificial dogs arrived. Ben and Lauren ate the hot dog and left me holding the bun. I thought things were looking up, I had my beer AND another cat herder to assist me. It was about this time a cold front blew through. Did I bring jackets for the kids? Nope. Lauren did her best to climb inside of me. Kicking my beer and sloshing a valuable sip every three seconds. By the 5th inning we were all huddled together in 2 1/2 seats, only using half of the seats we purchased. My beer was gone and so was my sense of humor so I asked Travis if he was still having fun. He looked at me as though I was crazy, "Yes, aren't you?" Were we at the same game? Obviously not! I had to keep reminding myself there is no crying in baseball! I convinced the boys to throw in the towel early and forgo the promised base running after the game. Our neighbor works at the ballpark and told me that they let the kids run the bases every Friday night. I will be happy to return so Jack can run the bases as long as I have a babysitter for Ben and Lauren and it is at least 20 degrees warmer!

Everyone's A Winner!

The first baseball game was great! I was proud of both of my boys! Jack had a great game and Travis was a great coach. The games are similar to watching snow melt or paint dry, but at least the kids are cute. Each team bats 6 kids per inning then they switch. The coach pitches three balls; if the batter misses he gets to hit off the tee. When the player gets a hit he runs one base at a time until the final batter who runs all the way home. There is no score kept, but I guess they technically tie since everyone comes home. Jack hit from the pitch, after he hit the ball he was so stunned that he just stood at home plate for a second. Lucky for him, the other team was a little stunned too, so he beat the throw to first. Yeah Jack! Soccer wasn't really Jack's game, but I think baseball has definite promise!

In The Beginning...

So I am finally catching up on my blog reading, just a short break from my cape sweat shop. I read Such Simple Pleasures engagement story and I have decided to be a topper...

Once upon a time in a land far, far away called Nebraska there was a young college girl dating a young college boy. We were 19 years old. We had talked about getting married some day. Travis took me to the jewelry store because "he wanted to know what I liked for when he bought a ring 'someday'". As we looked at what our 19-year-old budget would afford us (pictured in a previous post here)...

Travis: Do you like that one?
Me: Yes.
Travis: Do you want it?
Me: Sure.
Travis: We'll take it.

What? Was that the proposal? Very few words were exchanged on the way home from the store. What had we just done? Were we engaged? I didn't know and I don't think he did either. As the days passed and we knew the ring would be in soon Travis went to my dad's office and asked for my hand. I told Travis that he would have to ask me to marry him. So, after picking up the ring we drove to my parent’s house to share the news with my mom. On the way Travis remembered that he had to ask me and stopped at the little park not far from my parent's house. I couldn't help but think of the time my sister peed into her pants at that very same park years before. We were on a bike ride at the park when my sister announced that she had to go to the bathroom. The two blocks home seemed way too far so I convinced her to squat. She pulled her purple sweat pants (yes, I remember it like it was yesterday) and arced a stream of pee right into her pants. Did she stop? Oh no, she kept going; apparently she hadn't perfected her Kiegels at this point in her life. She pulled up her pants and cried all the way home! But, I digress...a lot! So, we walked to a little bridge, Travis got down on one knee and asked me to marry him as two little boys who were riding their bikes watched on. Travis slipped the ring on my finger and on we went to show my mom. My dad had obviously done a good job keeping the secret because when we showed my mom she started crying. They weren't all tears of joy either. Remember, we were 19, through her tears she mustered "When? When?". She pulled it together when she realized that we weren't planning to marry until we graduated from college. Our parents had told us that they wouldn't pay for school if we were married and we believed them. Now that I am a parent I tend to think they would have continued to pay, but that is water under the bridge!

Yes, I realize it wasn't romantic. I sometimes wish I had a great story to tell, something that involved skydiving or tens of thousands of people or Oprah, but it didn't. All I know is that I wouldn't trade the life I have for a fabulous proposal. I love my husband, I love my kids and I love my life!

Update, Update, Update

I realize I have left everyone on the edge of their seats on several issues in the last week or so. So, here are the updates!

First and foremost we got Lauren's test results back. Here chest X-rays came back clear, her sinus X-ray showed a little fluid and her blood test showed elevated white cells. The doctor thinks the reason for the elevated white cells and the fluid on the sinus X-ray is a mild sinus infection. So, hopefully the antibiotic will do the trick. I have to say that I am not completely satisfied with the diagnosis, but I am thankful that they didn't find signs of cancer! What a relief, thanks for the prayers!

I am sure you all remember the amoxicillin incident. I know this has been a burning question for many of you. After I showered and bathed the kids the smell was still there. I realized later that day the reason for the nagging smell was that I also got the nasty medicine on my pajama pants. I know, I am gross, after I got out of the shower I put my pajama pants back on because we were just going to be hanging around the house all day. The moral of the story: If you take a shower, don't put dirty clothes on afterwards even if you don't have any plans!

Lastly, the gift exchange update. I got the nerve and Travis' permission to send an email to his cousin that organizes the exchange every year.

Hey D!

I don't know if you hang on to the Christmas exchange list or not, but I am
curious if you know who had Travis' name. He didn't receive a gift this
year. This has happened to others in our family in the past and I am just
wondering if there is someone in the exchange that doesn't want to be...

Kelli

Her response:

Kelli -

I did not get anything either. Let me see if I can find the list.

D

This went down yesterday and I haven't heard anything else from her. My question is this, why are we doing this if there are TWO out of the 10 people in the exchange that are not even playing by the 'rules'. I know Travis and I are only doing this out of obligation, how many others out of the remaining 6 feel the same way we do? Based on this information I think it is safe to say at least 40% of the family would like to see this thing die. I will keep you posted!

Thank You Notes

My husband read my post about his family rarely thanking us for the gifts that I send them and he thought he was calling me out by saying that I don't send thank yous either. Wrong! Does he think that I was raised by wolves? My mommy taught me better than that! Growing up my sister and I weren't allowed to play with our new toys until we had written a thank you note for the gift. I must admit, I am not that strict, but I am making Jack sign his name to each of his cards. He has had to take several breaks because "his hand hurts", but I know he will get it done. I told him that if he didn't want to sign his name we could just give the gifts back. For each card he asks me who the card is for and wants me to remind him what they gave him. There hasn't been a card yet that he didn't think was worth signing! I guess I just haven't been keeping Travis up-to-date on what I do from day to day. I have been sending thank you notes to everyone who sends us a gift for the last 10 years! Now that we have kids I make thank you notes a 'table time' activity. Here is a picture of all 33 thank you notes the kids and I did today! This is the proof Travis!!

The Sweet Smell Of Amoxicillin In The Morning...

Last night my wonderful husband helped me out by administering Lauren's amoxicillin. While I put Ben and Lauren to bed Travis put the medicine back in the fridge.

As anyone who has ever been sentenced to 10 days of amoxicillin knows you must 'shake well' before pulling the medicine up into the syringe and holding the child down to cram the medicine down her gullet. Unfortunately, I didn't get past the 'shake well' this morning. Ben and Lauren were under-foot as usual when I pulled the medicine out of the fridge. I will admit I hadn't cracked open my Diet Mountain Dew so I was in a bit of a daze because I was caffeine deficient. Without inspecting the bottle I began shaking. Travis hadn't gotten the lid on tight. The lid went flying the medicine went everywhere. On my pajamas. In my hair. Down the refrigerator door. On Ben's pajamas. In Ben's hair. On Lauren's dress. In Lauren's hair. On the floor. On the counter. On the toy I had to step over to get to the fridge.

Lauren: You made a mess mama!
Ben: I'm wet.
Lauren: You trashed the kitchen mom.
Ben: What happened?
Lauren: I'm wet too.
Ben: What are you doing mommy?
Me: (in my head @#$@!@@$#%) ENOUGH!

I took off my soiled pajamas and used them to wipe up the bulk of the mess as my fat rolls hung out for any golfer going by my kitchen window to see. I have showered and given baths, but I can still smell the stench of amoxicillin.

And, that is not the only mess I will clean up today. The ticking time bomb has decided to wear her Dora panties today after a much needed potty hiatus over the holidays.

Bah Humbug!

About the time Travis and I got married (10 years ago) some of his female cousins decided to start a secret Santa gift exchange. We all draw a name then purchase a gift for about $30. The exchange is made up of Travis' 4 cousins, their spouses and his sister and brother-in-law. When everyone started having kids they threw them in the mix too with a $15 gift. So, so do the math 2 $30 gifts and 3 $20 gifts for a total of $120. I love giving gifts to people I actually know, but I can count on one hand how many times I have actually met these people. So, the joy of giving is out since I don't know what to get them, nor do I know if they like it because I rarely receive a thank you note. I would much prefer to spend an extra $120 on my kids. But, that isn't the worst part, more times than not someone in our family is shorted. That's right, someone doesn't get a gift. That means there is someone in Travis' family that receives a gift but doesn't give one. From the first time this happened I have asked Travis to politely opt out of the gift exchange for the following year. But, he doesn't because he doesn't want to ruffle any feathers. It really gets my goat when it is one of my kids that gets screwed. I don't know why because my kids certainly don't need any more toys. This year Travis drew the short straw. At which point do we assume the gift isn't coming? We know who didn't have his name because we received gifts from two of his cousins so that narrows it down, but doesn't pin point it. Do we ask the keeper of 'the list' who had Travis' name? But if we ask, then what? Do we confront the Grinch? What would you do?

Love Notes

Dear Husband,

The next time one of our evil spawn start fussing in the middle of the night listen to me when I say, "he is just fussing, he will settle down in a minute". Please don't guilt me into bringing him to bed with us. And, if you are some how able to convince me to do this again, I call the head you can have the feet.

Sincerely,
Your loving wife


Dear Ben,

Oh Benny, Benny, Benny, I do love you so, but not at 3am. The next time you start screaming in the middle of the night there best be some blood involved. If I wanted my back massaged by little feet I would have a little Chinese woman walk on my back, no need to kick the shit out of me. I know you are a happy boy, but please reserve your singing for when the sun is up. If I ever eat too many retard sandwiches again and invite you into my bed please keep the following rules in mind: 1. No kicking mommy, 2. No singing, 3. No snoring, 4. Bring your own pillow, mine is not big enough for the two of us, 5. You are a small boy, you only get a small portion of the bed, you must lay parallel to mommy and daddy, 6. Same for covers, they do not need to be wrapped around you, we have a king sized quilt on a queen sized bed, there should be enough for everyone. My bed, my rules, if you don't like it stay in your own bed!

Love,
Your tired mommy

I Liked You Just The Way You Were!

I was watching Oprah yesterday and Hillary Swank was on cutting 8 inches off her hair to donate to Beautiful Lengths. The hair is used to make wigs for women who have lost their hair due to cancer treatment. I had a hair cut scheduled for this afternoon and I had been thinking that I wanted to do something different. The show was just what I needed to motivate me to cut my hair short! I am going to be sending my hair off on Monday! I have a cute little angled bob after cutting off about 9 inches. It took Travis a while to say he liked it and Jack told me "I liked you just the way you were". I guess it is just going to take the men in my life a little time to adjust!

Daddy Made Me Do It

Last night when I got home from class Travis told me that he didn't get Jack to bed on time. I don't mind telling you I was a little annoyed since I am the one who has to deal with the cranky morning aftermath. Trav got Jack's pajamas on, and then Jack asked to stay up and watch TV with him. When they heard the garage door Jack ran up to his bed and pretended to be asleep. It was their little secret. That is until this morning when Jack threw his dad under the bus.

Me: Boy, you really slept in, did you get to bed on time last night?
Jack: No, daddy made me do it!
Me: Daddy made you stay up late?
Jack: Yes, he wanted me to stay up and watch TV with him. I told him I should go to bed, but he told me not to.

Something You Don't Know About Me...

I don't put gas in my car, or any other car for that matter. The tank gets low, and then it is miraculously full again. One of the modern mysteries!

As we were driving home from photography class last night I mentioned to Anne that I needed gas and that I was probably going to have to get it myself since it couldn't wait until the weekend. Anne was shocked that I don't get my own gas and said that would be one of those little known facts about myself. You see Travis knows that I hate getting gas so he does it for me. What is there to hate? I don't know; it is just a waste of time. I am always late leaving the house (notice I didn't say late to arrive, I make up time on the road!) and the last thing I have time for is stopping for gas. I can never remember what side the gas tank is on so I always look like an idiot leaning my head out the open door to see if it is on the drivers side. When I finally get parked I forget how to open the gas lid...is it called a lid? I don't know! Travis insists on having me drive these newfangled foreign cars that require you to push a button on the inside before you open the lid from the outside. What was wrong with the 1980 Dodge Omni I drove when I was 16 where the cap just screwed off? When I finally get pumping it never fails that I end up with gas on my hand, shoe and car. Not to mention I can’t stand what gas costs, I hate knowing that I just spent $40-$50. I could buy a new pair of jeans for that! I am just happier burying my head in the sand. You see, what I don’t know can’t hurt me!
When I got home last night I told Travis about my bad luck. So sad that I would have to pump my own gas. He offered to go get me more last night, but I declined. I can get my own gas, I just prefer not to! This morning while I slept in (until the kids got up at 7am) Travis went out and got gas in my car so I wouldn't have to do it on the way to drop Jack off at school. Now, that is a good man!

To Shot Or Not To Shot?

The kids and I got flu shots this morning. I was pleasantly surprised that they didn't seem to hurt as much this year. Maybe we just got a good nurse, who knows! I mentioned to Travis a week or so ago that I really think he should get a flu shot this year. I was shocked when he asked me "why?” I reminded him of the last two years when he was dying in bed for days with the flu while the rest of the family remained healthy. "I got sick?" he asked with surprise. Hello? Are you not the same person who told me last year to make you get a flu shot this year? Not to mention the guilt trip my neurologist attempted to send my dear husband on last year when he found out Travis hadn't been vaccinated. When I brought that up Travis played dumb. How is it possible to forget both the illness and the doctor's wishes? Imagine my surprise when Travis told me that the traveling nurses were actually at his office passing out flu shots and he declined. What's the over/under on Trav getting the flu this year?